Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Sometimes it's the simpliest things


Sometimes it's the simplest things that prove to be our biggest struggle, challenge, hurdle.  They stir up feelings of worry, anxiety, fear and we wonder "how in the world will we ever _____" (fill in the blank).

I am sure dads feel this way, but I can only speak from the mom side of it.  I remember when T was born I would do things at odd hours of the day, like take a shower at 4 am after nursing and go back to bed dressed. I thought, how am I ever going to be able to take a shower at a normal time, and well a normal pace.  I had mastered the art of 12 minute showers and getting ready for the day, which included shaving.  How do I know it was 12 minutes? Because he had an ocean project that I would turn on with music for him to watch and listen to while I did it.  Then, with time, it became much easier.

Now, I hit that point again.  Several months ago I decided I really wanted to get into working out and would during nap time for my oldest.  But I never wanted to get really sweaty or really into because I wouldn't be able to take a shower until after all were in bed.  So I thought. And felt really.  The idea of doing a good workout and then getting to take a shower stressed me out.  When really, it should have gone the other way.  I find that I enjoy a good exercise and it does so much for my mood and emotions.  I did manage to squeeze it all in just after A went down for nap, but before T woke from his.

Looking back, I don't understand why it was tough and why I felt the way I did.  But I do know, in that moment the tasks seemed so daunting. The thought came to mind today after I did a workout and did get to shower, pretty close to right after. Sometimes, we are our biggest obstacles creating our own versions and playing it in our heads, while letting the "what ifs" get us stuck.

All to often, I will do this.  I could list the what if questions, the scenarios I would run through my mind, but it would take pages. What I will say is that it can be done, we can figure it out, and we can keep things simple. We need to let them happen in their own timing sometimes, but it can be done.  There will come a day when all those tasks that seemed so daunting, come to you with the greatest of ease. For now, take heart in the idea that you are not the only one.