Friday, June 5, 2020

In the Quiet

In the quiet, in the silence what do you feel?

For me, I rarely let myself do this.  When it is quiet in the house, I tend to turn the T.V. on, put music on, listen to a podcast.  I do something.  Even if I try reading, I let random scrolling pull me away.

The reality is, true silence is not around us.  But we can easily fill ourselves with other stuff that we don't hear the natural sounds around us, like the birds, the breeze in the trees...and so much more.

All to often when left in the quiet, even if there are still nature's noises, I can't quiet my mind.  It goes off on one trail after another, sometimes spirals.  Even when I write, I put on instrumental music.  Yes, in some ways I may lack focus and in other ways I have too much focus.  It all depends on what distractions I allow in.  It all depends on how present I am in the moment.

So why do I feel so awkward in the silence?  

I have been asking myself this lately.  I even fall asleep to the sounds of the fan because it doesn't feel right to have nothing.  I just need a low quiet something going to lull me to sleep.  It seems to let my mind focus on that one thing, instead of wondering, as I fall asleep.

But still, the silence feels uncomfortable.  I feel uneasy and look for look for ways to distract myself.  Yet, it is in the quiet that things happen deeper within us.  It is in the quiet that God talks to us.  It is in the quiet when our hearts open and we are most aware.  

And maybe that is why I feel uncomfortable.  Am I ready to face what is really going on in my heart?  Am I ready to understand?  Am I ready to set it free?

Are you?

Part of me says yes I am and part of me says nope.  Yet if I allow myself, so much can come from it.  From release, to healing, to growth, to deepening connection...and more.    Where would it lead?  Could it lead?

In the silence, we can set free...find safety...

Is it hard for you to be in the quiet?  Do you have insight into why?

What do you do to find quiet?  How do you get yourself into that space?

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